Death

Depression and sadness overwhelms me. Everyday pass, a sorrowful pain is piercing me in all directions. Problems cant never been solved. Past and memories which cant be brought back always come in my dream. I dont know if I will stand it much longer. I dont know how? An another day pass. I am so very tired. I am so very sleepy and I want to sleep very long even in one day. I just want to take a break from all this pains. What will happen if I became a ghost?

I see my self lying on floor filled with blood. I can see my self rushing towards me with blood on its face staring at me with his bloody eyes. I can see my self die in different positions with blood scattered around the floor. Sorrow and anger is mixed upon me. I dont know what to do. I kept myself into dark and afraid to see the light. Cheering me up cant help me. I really dont know how. I see myself dying little by little on my own room on my own dress on my own eyes.

I just want to end it now but I cant. I promise to her that I will not leave her side. I wont. But is there any solution to end this sorrow? Is there any other way to end all of this crap. I dont want to escape but it forces me. I want a help. I dont demand. I am so tired I want to sleep. And I will keep my promise to her forever. I am only living because of her. I can see the shadow of death behind me but i am not afraid because I know that someday I will surpass all of this. I hope so.